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LEGION

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On 6/15/2020 at 4:25 PM, AONO. said:

I legit thought something happened to you. Got hit by the virus or something. 

Reading this made me wonder... what if, God forbid, someone from this forum actually got the virus? We've got so many previously active members that haven't logged on in months but what if the reason behind some of those cases is them getting hit by the virus and... maybe something worse as a result? Quite scary when you think about it. I hope you all stay safe and come out of these horrific times unscathed. 

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Who else stopped being active besides me? 

I did isolate for 2 weeks from work because my anti-depressants were not working and were lowering my immune system and I didn’t wanna catch it.

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No one in particular is "active" these days. I was just talking about the guys I liked that haven't logged on and/or posted in months. Miss my dudes Starstruck, Willows Way, Kirky, Lyriqz :( Don't think Jiggy's posted in a while either, although he's active on Twitter.

Shame M3J's still around though.

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20 minutes ago, Jeb ? said:

Oh yea, wonder what happened to Willows Way. Just saw Starstruck posted in the WWE Universe section recently

I always thought that was some other Starstruck lol, literally just realized it's his second account :lol: 

Good to know my boy's still alive and well

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5 hours ago, Crazy. said:

No one in particular is "active" these days. I was just talking about the guys I liked that haven't logged on and/or posted in months. Miss my dudes Starstruck, Willows Way, Kirky, Lyriqz :( Don't think Jiggy's posted in a while either, although he's active on Twitter.

Shame M3J's still around though.

Lyriqz ?

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18 minutes ago, Crazy. said:

Willows was online earlier today actually, I left a message on his profile. He just hasn't posted in a couple of months. 

Also, happy birthday to CAWs' GOAT GFX'er @E#37! I tried sending you a PM but your messages seem to be full. 

Thanks dude! Cleared some messages.

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Keep forgetting if E is the one who is also Dutch, but happy birthday nonetheless.

 

Anyway, I'm inactive because life sucks, corona sucks, I got diagnosed with depression and if I wasn't hellbent on at least making it until the end of One Piece, I probably wouldn't even be around anymore. So I'm pretty much unable to enjoy anything. Hana Kimura killing herself didn't help either, that one hit me hard too.

At some point you stop caring about hiding stuff I guess.

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10 hours ago, Crazy. said:

No one in particular is "active" these days. I was just talking about the guys I liked that haven't logged on and/or posted in months. Miss my dudes Starstruck, Willows Way, Kirky, Lyriqz :( Don't think Jiggy's posted in a while either, although he's active on Twitter.

Shame M3J's still around though.

You're so boring.

2 hours ago, E#37 said:

Thanks dude! Cleared some messages.

Happy birthday!

2 hours ago, Monkey D. Jiggy said:

Keep forgetting if E is the one who is also Dutch, but happy birthday nonetheless.

 

Anyway, I'm inactive because life sucks, corona sucks, I got diagnosed with depression and if I wasn't hellbent on at least making it until the end of One Piece, I probably wouldn't even be around anymore. So I'm pretty much unable to enjoy anything. Hana Kimura killing herself didn't help either, that one hit me hard too.

At some point you stop caring about hiding stuff I guess.

??

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Thanks for the messages.

 

I don't really care anymore if it's embarrassing and I don't like to express it, I feel like I'm attention seeking, but you know what the thing is? Life has been really hard for me for a very long time. I've been stressed out since I was 3 and started worrying about my place in life and also having to deal with the fact that one day I'll die and I've basically been alone since then. I've never had a birthday party. I blame and despise myself for not being able to figure out how life works. Then I made a friend. Then she died.

 

This study year, since September, I finally started to actually improve in life and be super social and connect to people and then corona happened and I've been stuck at home since and I lost all of that. By myself again. Some years ago, I stayed inside out of free will, now it's forced upon me at the exact moment I really didn't need it. It's unfair. A lot of things in life are, I'm aware. But honestly, right now, I give myself until the final chapter of One Piece gets released. Probably some years away, maybe 2, maybe 5. If things are still shitty by that time, I'm dead the second I'm done reading it. I don't have confidence there's anything in life in store for me and beyond One Piece, there's nothing in it I can look forward to. I'm not even sure if I can make it until the end. I'm in contact with professionals, but I don't tell them that part. I'm just really tired of waiting for better days, if even only to experience a single one and then not even getting that. Good days aren't owed to anyone. It's never guaranteed I can turn it around. But I can't deal with that fact either. Not anymore.

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Man, I'm legit worried about you. You seem like you're in a really terrible place with no way out. I'm obviously no professional but all I can say is, just hang in there. It gets better. I know sometimes it doesn't seem like it, but it does. I've been through times where I've felt lonely and found myself wondering what even is the point of life, but I just held on to the hope that it will eventually get better, and it did. It didn't happen overnight, but it did. 

Your situation sounds like it's far worse than anything I experienced but I just hope you can hold on to the same hope that I did and will yourself on. Again, if you ever feel like the need to talk, you can always hit me up. 

Take care, man. 

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14 hours ago, Monkey D. Jiggy said:

Thanks for the messages.

 

I don't really care anymore if it's embarrassing and I don't like to express it, I feel like I'm attention seeking, but you know what the thing is? Life has been really hard for me for a very long time. I've been stressed out since I was 3 and started worrying about my place in life and also having to deal with the fact that one day I'll die and I've basically been alone since then. I've never had a birthday party. I blame and despise myself for not being able to figure out how life works. Then I made a friend. Then she died.

 

This study year, since September, I finally started to actually improve in life and be super social and connect to people and then corona happened and I've been stuck at home since and I lost all of that. By myself again. Some years ago, I stayed inside out of free will, now it's forced upon me at the exact moment I really didn't need it. It's unfair. A lot of things in life are, I'm aware. But honestly, right now, I give myself until the final chapter of One Piece gets released. Probably some years away, maybe 2, maybe 5. If things are still shitty by that time, I'm dead the second I'm done reading it. I don't have confidence there's anything in life in store for me and beyond One Piece, there's nothing in it I can look forward to. I'm not even sure if I can make it until the end. I'm in contact with professionals, but I don't tell them that part. I'm just really tired of waiting for better days, if even only to experience a single one and then not even getting that. Good days aren't owed to anyone. It's never guaranteed I can turn it around. But I can't deal with that fact either. Not anymore.

There's nothing embarrassing or "attention-seeking" about having mental health problems or sharing it, this should be normalized if anything. I do hope things get better for you, and we'd love to have you with us for decades to come. I wish I knew what to say or do to help, but you're not alone. You have us to talk with and support you, and I hope you feel comfortable enough to do that with any one of us who's okay with that. 

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